Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Rover The Top...
New Range Rover 'Coupe' Has 500 bhp And Diamond Dials
Hopefully Wayne Rooney has got room in his garage for one more car because this will be right up his street. If your average Range Rover with big wheels, bling, gold, mink interior, etc, etc isn’t showy enough then how about a three-door Range Rover Sport ‘Coupe’. We’ve got our hands on a sneak preview of what the car will look like, but put away your credit cards because the finished article won’t be ready until late spring 2008. It will be limited to 100 cars worldwide and is likely to cost over £100,000. Every panel will be new and made of carbon fibre, there will be a panoramic glass roof and LED lights all round. Still not bling enough? Diamonds can be put into the dials at every ten mph if you like. The engine can be made to produce over 500bhp and the cars will be supplied via select Land Rover Dealerships, said its creators at LSE design. Coming soon to a high street near you…
Monday, November 19, 2007
Size Matters...
A man walks into a bar with a monkey he had just bought at the pet store. He sits down at the bar and orders a beer. The monkey jumps down off his shoulder and runs over to the pool table and ate the cue-ball.
The bartender says “Your monkey just ate the cue-ball!!! GET OUT NOW!!” so the man picks up the monkey and leaves.
Two months later the same man comes back with the monkey on a leash. The monkey jumps off his shoulder and grabs a peanut, shoves it up his ass, pulls it out then eats it.
The bartender says ” Did your monkey just shove a peanut up his ass then eat it?”
The man says “Yeah ever since the cue-ball incident he checks everything for size”.
Look On The Positive Side...
Two old drunks in a bar. The first one says, “Ya know, when I was 30 and got a hard-on, I couldn’t bend it with either of my hands. By the time I was 40, I could bend it about 10 degrees if I tried really hard. “By the time I was 50, I could bend it about 20 degrees, no problem. I’m gonna be 60 next week, and now I can almost bend it in half with just one hand”
“So,” says the second drunk, “what’s your point?”
“Well,” says the first, “I’m just wondering how much stronger I’m gonna get!”
Sunday, November 18, 2007
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