Why Men Have it Better...

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.

Car mechanics tell you the truth.

Chocolate is just another snack.

Everything on your face stays its original color.

If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still be your friend.

New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

One mood, ALL the time.

One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.

People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

Same work, more pay.

The garage is all yours.

The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.

The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

The world is your urinal.

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

You almost never have strap problems in public.

You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

You can be president.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives, on December 24, in 45 minutes.

You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.

You can open all your own jars.

You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.

You don't have to shave below your neck.

You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

You know stuff about tanks.

You never have to drive to another gas station because this one's just too icky.

Your belly usually hides your big hips.

Your last name stays put.

Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.

Wedding dress - $5000; tux rental - $100.

Wedding plans take care of themselves.

Wrinkles add character.